Anti-Aging and Baggy Eyes

Anti-Aging and Baggy Eyes - ME?
Thursday, April 17, 2025 by Cindy Sproles

Image by Markus Distelrath from Pixabay Everyone deserves a vacation, and well, we’ve not had one in a couple of years. I mean, we went to Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg the week Hurricane Helene hit. Who can call that a vacation? So, when the opportunity arose for us to take a cheap flight to Orlando and pet sit for our son, the Prince, Chase, and I hopped aboard.

Our younger son and his wife were heading to the Florida Keys, and I suppose he and I were both on the same wavelength because the idea came up for us to grab a flight to Orlando on Allegiant and spend nine quiet days away from home, and enjoy Orlando. We arrived, spent a little time with our son and his wife, wished them a fond farewell, and lay back for a time away from home.

When you live in Orlando, you generally know someone who works at a theme park, and our son was able to secure complimentary tickets for us to two parks. We purchased and enjoyed the beautiful Cirque du Soleil, then took those “sweet” tickets that were gifted to us and had fun at a theme park just down the road. But then, on a whim, we decided to visit the Florida Mall. A friend told us it was fun and huge, so we decided, why not?

It was a beautiful mall, and I suppose bigger than anything close to us in Tennessee (even in Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg). I don’t think we could have walked the entire thing in one day. Anyway, the mall was lovely, and as we turned onto the main aisle, stores flanked us on both sides. It was apparent we were visitors. You could tell by the fact that our mouths hung to our knees.

What I was not prepared for were the merchants that filled the center of the mall walkways. Anything from incense to hair care and massages — you name it, all lined our walkway. Salespeople, I guess you call them salespeople. Clerks sound a bit Tennesseeish for Florida would lunge at you from their posts. Yes, lunge is the perfect word. “Try this.” “Here, let me show you…” “You want soft skin…” And yep, that was the one that got me.

I didn’t invite her into my space. She jumped in front of me and began sticking little black packets of samples into my hands, whether I wanted them or not. “Come here. Right here. Meet Olivia. She show you beautiful, soft skin.”

(No disrespect to those with this accent. I have my own, you know.)

Yep, I can say I was accosted and dragged into a store. Now, I didn’t go kicking and screaming. Being from Tennessee doesn’t mean you’re rude, but I did keep pulling my hand out of hers. Too close, if you know what I mean.

Before I knew it, she plopped me in a chair (the Prince, too, though Chase hightailed it out of the store. He was lucky the saleswoman only had two hands, or he’d have been slapped into a chair, too). Actually, his rear did faintly touch a chair, but then he bolted like a wild horse out of the store, leaving me and the Prince reeling at the hands of this…O-liv-i---aaaa.

I wear hearing aids. It was loud with the music in the store, and then you add a thick Eastern accent on top, and I’m pretty helpless. In fact, when cornered, I get a bit panicked. Olivia was in my space. I could barely hear her, much less understand her, and here she was…yanking off my glasses and telling me she could fix the bags under my eyes.

I saw the Prince grin. Which honestly made me want to throat punch, but I could see the humor. Within seconds, Olivia had smeared “stuff” all over my eyes and around my mouth.

“We get rid of laugh lines,” she said. Wait. I like my laugh lines. They show I’m happy, or I thought they did. Don’t they? Now, I’m getting self-conscious. I was suurreee laugh lines made me look happy.

“We fix baggy eyes.”

Baggy eyes?

“Oh, look. Fabulous! Fabulous. Maria, look fabulous.” Oliva motioned our accoster, Maria over.

“Oh…my god, WOW! Ten years off her. Beautiful. Sensational. I told you, you’d love.”

Did this woman just say, “Wow, ten years off her?” Excuse me.

“Look how the bags have vanished. Fabulous. Fabulous!” She clapped. “FABULOUS.”

Here it comes, folks—Olivia’s sales pitch.

“Now, Miss Cindy, if you order online from our store, you will pay $1,400.00 for this serum.”

I pushed her hand away, and horse laughed. Yes, I horse laughed. A big whinny and a ha-ha-ha.

“Oh, but wait,” Olivia said. “Here in the store, today only, I sell to you for $475.00. Almost 80% off.”

“Uh, no! Obviously, you don’t understand that I can’t afford serum. The entire family can enjoy $475.00. It would get us three tickets to SeaWorld.”

“Oh, all right. Where you live in Tennessee? I don’t have a consultant in Tennessee. Let me sign you up as consultant.”

“NO! I don’t want to be a consultant.”

“But you look fabulous. Just fabulous.” (Interject here, the mirror she shoved in my face.) “So, I don’t do this for everyone, but you are beautiful, Miss Cindy, and I want you to have no bags. So, I use my license and purchase for you our anti-aging serum for $100. Only today.”

“No, thank you.” And I stood from the chair she’d plastered me in. The Prince chuckled. “No. No. No.”

Now, my momma raised me right, so I turned and cupped my fingers gently around hers. “You’ve been so kind to show me your product. Thank you. But I’ve been a Mary Kay consultant for the better part of 30 years. I have great skin care at home and even use retinol. It’s a little slower process than your serum, but it does the trick.”

I smiled and walked away, still holding the black sample packet. We laughed all the way through the mall.

Here’s the kicker. Later that day, I spoke with my friend, who suggested that we visit the mall. We were laughing about my being accosted by an anti-aging saleswoman when I realized what store we’d landed in. Of all the stores in that lovely mall--Macy’s, Dillard's, Abercrombie & Fitch, or some other retail business above my pay grade at home, you’ll never guess which store I chose.

The stores were gorgeous, and their products were beautiful, but at the end of the day, we ended up at J. C. Penney. (lol...welcome to Central Florida!)

I know. I proved I’m just an out-of-place, less-than-fancy, no-frills country girl. Oh, and just so you know. By the time we reached the end of that mall section, Tim cocked his head and took hold of my chin.

“Uh, Cindy, your face is white. I mean, you have white stuff all over your eyes.”

So, Oliva, honey. I appreciate your efforts to correct my baggy eyes and laugh lines, but I ended up in the restroom washing off the $1400.00 serum that really only cost $100. Oh, and by the way, the restroom didn’t have paper towels, only fancy blowers to dry your hands. So, I hung upside down, trying to dry my face.

Despite it all, we had a blast. I don’t have to buy things to enjoy being with my boys. There’s little that beats good, old-fashioned fun, laughing with the men in your family. I don’t have to spend money to know how blessed I really am.

Just call me country bumpkin with the baggy eyes. (Are they really baggy? Droopy. Drippy? Stretched? Okay, overthinking!

Photo 1 – Image by Markus Distelrath from Pixabay Photo 2 – Image by Steven Yu from Pixabay Photo 3 - Image by photosforyou from Pixabay Photo 4 – ME

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Comments

Debbie From NW MO At 4/23/2025 3:03:48 PM

This was great! Been there, done that. I laughed more than once out loud. Every time I visit here you always make me smile.

Reply by: Cindy Sproles

Ahhh...good to know. Glad it makes you chuckle.

Kerri Tracht From Jacksonville, FL At 4/18/2025 12:47:45 PM

Oh, yes...they accost us everywhere down here. Home and Patio shows are their bread and butter as well as the Malls. I am convinced the miracle cream is nothing more than egg whites. Which explains the tightening and then the white residue. You, my friend, have the miracle serum in your back yard.

Reply by: Cindy Sproles

Lol. I do don't I? Bahahaha.

Chambers Sandra From Leland, NC At 4/18/2025 7:55:09 AM

Cindy, I read your blog this morning in bed while I still waking up and had a great laugh to start my day ?? I was disappointed that in your photo you had sunglasses on and I couldn’t see that miracle cream at work! I was ready to hop on a plane and get me some of it ??